Pity Party for One Please!

So a long time ago, I used to think that my life was always going to go in this ONE particular direction. I had one dream and although it's slightly wavered, it hasn't changed.

I was going to finish the dream college of my choice (enter GVSU) and from there attend some sort of a law school of my dreams (no particular one in mind) and then grow up to be this fabulous attorney--Legally blonde style.

It seems kind of foolish but now, there is no dream. There is no hope of where my future is going. Dead inside.

As I was sitting in class today, I decided to check my GPA. Turns out my GPA is lower than I believed it was. Try much lower. Enter in GPA of 3.4...

Now, even if I score amazingly on my LSAT. I won't get into a phenomenal school with that GPA and according to the the GPA calculator, I won't be able to bring it up to the level I want. Not only that, but COSTS.

Who was I kidding when I thought I would be able to AFFORD law school? I'm not millionaire. Hell, when I find $10 in my coat pocket, I feel like the richest girl.

Now what?

I can't afford to keep putting myself through school. I keep thinking, I will graduate with the dumbest degree which has no purpose for my life. I won't get a serious job because my grades aren't where I need them to be.

Where am I going? What in the heck am I doing?

The optimist in me is trying to scream, Katherine, the Lord is trying to show you. Just let the Almighty work inside you. On the other hand, the pessimist in me is screaming, you're a failure. Give it up and take up a job at your local Mickey D's for life.

Maybe this is the time to decide what I truly want. So tonight, I'm gonna sit and read my bible listen to some quality music praising the Lord and just think it out.

Lord move in a way, that I've never seen before

Cause there's a mountain in the way and a lock on the door

I'm drifting away, waves are crashing on the shore

So Lord move, or move me